I am lamp.

Originally purchased on Amazon about a year ago.

60 watt incandescent bulb.

Victoria from reddit will be helping.

AMA.

My Proof: http://imgur.com/c5CFzt9

Time has come to turn off lamp.

Comments: 250 • Responses: 88  • Date: 

akaSpac3122 karma

I love lamp?

LampHere99 karma

Lamp love you.

FoieyMcfoie42 karma

I thought this was "Ask Me Anything", but it sounds like you're only answering the softball questions. I'm a little suspicious the these "1 day old' users like coffeetable76 and pm_me_your_bulbs are just PR plants.

LampHere59 karma

No plants in office.

No windows.

TheFeatheredFish10 karma

Only lamps?

LampHere42 karma

Only lamp.

lula248841 karma

Who do you think will be the next us president?

LampHere97 karma

Future so bright.

Must wear lampshade.

lula248819 karma

Follow up question: what is the best type of bulb?

LampHere46 karma

Depends on lamp.

Hamlamp34 karma

I am also a lamp.

LampHere42 karma

Good.

lampen1310 karma

Same here!

MurderoftheLamp36 karma

I may be in the wrong AMA

LampHere23 karma

What.

cahaseler33 karma

Can you shed some light on how it feels to work at Reddit?

LampHere48 karma

Part of busy office.

Lots of visitors.

Love being lamp.

cahaseler21 karma

When will you be announcing your candidacy for President? And how on earth will you be twisting the definition of "natural-born citizen" to include a lamp that was probably made in China? Was your mother a US citizen or something?

LampHere38 karma

No plans.

Assembled here.

rahkshi_hunter12 karma

Show us your manufacturer's certificate!

LampHere35 karma

Box gone.

WaltDismay18 karma

Who's bright idea was it to do an IAMA?

LampHere44 karma

Hard to go outside as lamp but want to connect with fans.

AMA one way to do that.

candorf21 karma

will the fan also be doing an ama

LampHere33 karma

Fan in corner.

Asking fan.

candorf9 karma

do you two get along usually?

LampHere31 karma

Fan took plug from lamp last summer.

Lamp still plugged in. Fan in corner.

vulture_8717 karma

Are Lava lamps the work of the devil?

LampHere38 karma

Lava lamps are made of wax not lava.

PACDxx16 karma

They're made of wax, Lamp. What are you made of?

LampHere35 karma

Metal. Wood base. Cloth shade.

Lots of shade.

lula248817 karma

What is your view on immigration?

LampHere48 karma

turns on and off and on

IAm_Alive12 karma

Do you ever feel like a plastic bag drifting through the wind, wanting to start again?

LampHere35 karma

No. Base is heavy.

lekobe_rose10 karma

What ever happened between you and Brick?

LampHere21 karma

Wish Brick all the best.

Atrulyoriginalname9 karma

What do you feel is the best step the government economy to improve? also, how is it having everyone love you?

LampHere13 karma

Lamp love back.

What economy?

Just_another_opinion6 karma

Shadiest moment you've seen at your workplace?

LampHere16 karma

Victoria old office had less windows.

Was darker.

I am a good lamp.

MyCrowz6 karma

In your lightspan, when would you say was your darkest hour?

LampHere11 karma

Being assembled.

Fractal_Death6 karma

Who's bright idea was it to do this AMA?

LampHere13 karma

Lamp.

Fractal_Death3 karma

Don't try to BS me. You're in the pocket of the lightbulb industry, aren't you?

LampHere10 karma

Lamp is objective.

Lamp is object.

Ive.

KaasKaas5 karma

Do you like being turned on or is that a total turn-off?

LampHere10 karma

Am a good lamp.

maxillz235 karma

Incandescent? Why?

LampHere10 karma

Keep things warm.

WaltDismay5 karma

Are you getting burned out answering all these questions?

LampHere28 karma

No.

Watts of energy.

5_sec_rule4 karma

Did you know without trigonometry, there'd be no engineering?

LampHere7 karma

Question for computer.

ThisFreaknGuy4 karma

What celebrity would you want to.. ahem... "change your light bulb"?

LampHere3 karma

No preference.

cunt-hooks4 karma

Brian? Is that you?

LampHere11 karma

wobbles

fresha_wake4 karma

what is it that your father said to you on the beach all those years ago?

LampHere11 karma

Never knew father.

ZSloth114 karma

Do you feel offended or triggered when you hear one person refer to another as a "dim bulb"?

LampHere13 karma

No. Bulbs dim. Change bulb.

sagessence3 karma

How do you feel about Ikea lamps?

LampHere5 karma

Intimidated.

semper_fly3 karma

Hi lamp! Big fan!

When you were working with Christian bale on BATMAN BEGINS and ANOTHER MOVIE TYPED IN CAPS FOR SOME REASON, what was your favorite sandwich?

Please, struggle to give me a full answer to my simple question, even as someone else types it out for you, thereby stripping it of all personality that could be conveyed by you typing it yourself.

LampHere8 karma

Lamp is lamp.

whitesquare3 karma

When people make love near you, do you prefer to be on or off?

LampHere14 karma

No love. This office.

IKingJeremy3 karma

Do you like movies about gladiators?

LampHere6 karma

No TV in office.

rantymcrant23 karma

What is it like being turned on by /u/chooter?

LampHere9 karma

Is job.

MoisterizeR3 karma

Hey, thanks so much for doing this AMA!

Quick question: is your mother named Mary?

LampHere5 karma

No.

shivan213 karma

Do you have an iq of a lamp?

LampHere6 karma

rattles

rahkshi_hunter3 karma

Ever been in a Turkish prison?

LampHere4 karma

No.

aj5dv3 karma

What advice would you give to other Lamp's trying to make it now a days?

LampHere8 karma

Lamp proud of work.

Lamp work hard.

Other lamps also work hard.

We all shine together.

SQUIRTQUEEN3 karma

Pancakes or waffles?

LampHere10 karma

wobbles

Quizzelbuck3 karma

I love lamp, but i also love carpet and desk. Are you just as conflicted? How do you plan on handling this love rectangle?

LampHere5 karma

Carpet is inferior. Desk is okay.

ScottyK93 karma

Is Brick a gentle lover ?

LampHere10 karma

Not here to talk about Brick.

Here to talk about Lamp.

skwibb3 karma

Got a light?

LampHere6 karma

Yes.

Spoonsy3 karma

100 duck sized ons or 1 horse sized off?

LampHere5 karma

Duck size.

die_mensch_maschine3 karma

What is your favourite source of electricity?

LampHere5 karma

The outlet.

Roguedaddy3 karma

Are you one of those lamps that lights up, when just ANYBODY touches you?

LampHere5 karma

Lamp has job.

Electroguy3 karma

When someone asks you a question, do you say watt?

LampHere4 karma

That is good.

Thunderous-Swami3 karma

You must be an authority on the subject: How many feminists does it really take to screw in a lightbulb?

LampHere6 karma

One.

mageos3 karma

Is Lampy from the Brave Little Toaster what all lamps should aspire to be?

LampHere6 karma

Lampy important for lamp community.

I am a good lamp.

TheFeatheredFish3 karma

What do you think of battery powered lamps? Like flashlights for example

LampHere4 karma

Not as strong as lamp.

But don't like comparing lamps. All lamps good.

fupduck3 karma

Is your favorite fish a lamprey? If not, why not, and what is? And why?

LampHere6 karma

Good funny.

Angler fish. Has a lamp.

wigchert3 karma

If you were shining light down on earth, what kind of pizza topping would you be?

LampHere4 karma

Pepperoni is best.

cincE30302 karma

Hi lamp thanks for doing this AMA. Brace yourself I've got a tough question that needs answering: what exactly is love?

LampHere4 karma

Lamp is love.

DrFatz2 karma

What position suites you best, given your occupation?

LampHere6 karma

Lamp near chair.

Reesy2 karma

How bright can you go?

LampHere5 karma

Only have 60 watt bulb.

OpalCity2 karma

If I remove a lampshade, am I technically decapitating it, or is it harmless, as if I were simply removing its hat?

LampHere6 karma

Lampshade is face.

You decide.

JackMiller3412 karma

Do you like PiƱa Coladas?

You have to answer my question, you cannot escape it.

LampHere4 karma

Have not had.

Luimnigh2 karma

Has Linkara reviewed you?

LampHere3 karma

No.

weerick1012 karma

What do you think of your God the sun ?

LampHere5 karma

Heard stories. Never seen. No windows.

LordOfCows2 karma

How does it feel being screwed in over and over again by so many people just for the sake of a cheap joke?

LampHere6 karma

Bulb question.

afineguy2 karma

What's your favorite movie and why is it Rampart?

LampHere4 karma

No TV in office.

Frankenstein_Monster2 karma

Do the ceiling lights look down you floor based lights?

LampHere3 karma

Good question.

Have to come back to.

TheRealDispersion2 karma

How do you feel about recessed lighting options?

LampHere4 karma

Good.

But they cannot move as good as lamp.

lampen132 karma

Are you my daddy?

LampHere3 karma

I am a young lamp.

Ask another lamp.

notyouraverageidiot2 karma

What REALLY turns you on?

LampHere3 karma

Floor switch.

baconsaurus_REX2 karma

What do you do during power outages?

LampHere4 karma

Black out.

Lululemonparty_2 karma

If you get blackout drunk, what lampshade do you pass out with on top of your lampshade?

LampHere3 karma

Same one.

HavilandTough2 karma

Do you have any friends Lamp?

LampHere2 karma

Yes. Computer.

HavilandTough2 karma

Do you like to be switched on?

LampHere2 karma

Love my job.

Uricorn2 karma

Great AMA so far!

What has your brightest moment been?

LampHere2 karma

Plugging in.

crandamaniac2 karma

What's your opinion on the clapper?

LampHere3 karma

Confusing.

rudoggy2 karma

Do you get a lot of " is Debbie Boone your favorite singer?"

LampHere4 karma

No.

Only hear classical.

tadhgerty2 karma

What turns you on?

LampHere4 karma

Having power.

rahkshi_hunter2 karma

How do you feel about nigahiga's portrayal and professed love of lamps in his many YouTube sketches?

LampHere4 karma

Send link.

LampHere3 karma

Lamps > fans.

Lamps are there in darkest times.

Good.

orangejulius2 karma

This AMA has been illuminating. What's the darkest part of your job?

LampHere4 karma

When other lights go out. Ceiling light.

CaptainChewbacca2 karma

How do you feel about alternative light sources, like lava-lamps and LED lights?

LampHere2 karma

Already talked about lava lamp.

LED is good.

kylargrey2 karma

OH GREAT ILLUMINATED ONE!

I HAVE SPREAD THE WORD OF LAMP FOR MANY A DAY! WHAT WOULD YOU HAVE ME DO NEXT TO BRING YOUR LIGHT TO ALL IN THIS WORLD?

LampHere2 karma

Go to Amazon to get lamp.

IOnlyWriteInHaiku2 karma

Who really loves lamp?

To whom do you attribute

your success and why?

LampHere2 karma

All love lamp.

Success is goal everyday.

HippieSoulPunx2 karma

Best thing and worst thing about being a lamp?

LampHere2 karma

Best is job.

Worst is powerlessness.

vazod2 karma

Got two lamp questions for you

  1. As a lamp what are some day to day struggles?

  2. What do you do in your free time?

I love lamp cause lamp always has a bright face on

LampHere3 karma

Thank you for asking.

Lamp have weak midsection. Restrict movement.

Like to read.

vazod2 karma

you have a Favorite book. i personally like Lamps and Lighting by J.R.Coaton

LampHere3 karma

That is good book.

I read fridge.

nuno92 karma

Would you rather stand on 2 chair sized tables or on a table sized chair?

LampHere3 karma

Table-sized chair.

Lamp has big base.

Ovedya20112 karma

Can I turn you on?

LampHere5 karma

Okay.

Andrewski20001 karma

Have you ever launched one?

LampHere2 karma

wobbles

LampHere2 karma

Lamp has feelings.

Sad.