AMA JIMMY KIMMEL... online now for your enjoyment

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this made me laugh

Do you ever think about the fact that you are on late at night and at any given time there are probably 1000's of people fornicating with you on in the background?

always

What is the biggest thing you hate about Matt Damon?

his stupid face

Have you ever heard about Rampart?

my publicist says you should definitely see Rampart.

My favorite guest will be Oprah when she sits beside me on Sunday night after the Academy Awards

Was that flashing video staged, or did that woman feel compelled to do that on her own?

not only did she do it on her own - she did it three times

Why did the Man Show end!? I miss its splendor and glory... and girls on trampolines.

we wanted to go out before it became pathetic.

How was Ben Affleck in bed?

rough, but tender

Just wanted to let you know. I am from Germany and never saw your show live on TV, but still I watch all the YT videos that get posted. If I were able to see your show it would be my favorite by far. Enjoy the views and laughs I always have.

Greetings from Germany

as they say in Germany, gracias!

Does Adam really complain that much?

more even

What guest have you always wanted on your show, but still have not yet to get?

Letterman. Bill Murray. Steve Martin...for starters

is eminem as awkward as he seems, or does he loosen up backstage?

believe it or not, he's a friendly guy

What's your favourite memory from Win Ben Stein's Money?

Ben taking naps during every commercial break

I saw your friend Adam Carolla do a show in Durham, NC and he told a story about your house, a football game, and Tom Cruise.

Is Adam full of shit, or did that really happen? You asked him (Adam) to do his 'touch down' dance that involved him pretending to shit out a football. In front of Tom and his Mom haha ... oh and did Tom really bring cupcakes AND his mother to your house... for a football game?

except for the cupcakes, it happened.

Hi, Jimmy. Will you hire me to be your sidekick, I will get you coffee and be snarky to everyone else that isn't you.

probably, yes

Describe Andy Milonakis in 5 words.

very very very very weird

The "Jimmy Kimmel Told Me To..." segment is genius! Which one is your favorite and who came up with the idea to do it?

hard to top the kids and the Halloween candy

How big are Adam Carolla's eyebrows in real life?

I believe you mean eyeBROW - there's only one of them. they're substantial

I just want you to know that when I was in labor and giving birth I requested to watch your show in the delivery room. It was 8 years ago, Snoop was on, and it was a lovely distraction. So thank you!

wow! very cool

Have you ever seen a naked lady?

once. it was AWESOME. she had all the parts

What would Karl Malone say about Reddit?

he would probably mistake it for canned whipped cream

Is Guillermo as awesome as he seems on TV?

triple it. Hung out with him for 3 hours last night. He is funny

I noticed when you have a guest who is kind of nervous or shy, you handle it a lot better than any of the other late night talk show hosts. Do you feel for them or do you just think it's kind of funny?

I feel for them. It is nerve-wracking to do a talk show. You have 7 minutes to be funny. Sometimes it feels like speed dating

Selfish question. I swear I saw you at an airport in Naples Italy in June 2004. Could it be true?

Yes!

What was your favorite part of having Lady Gaga on your show again? Anything surprise you about her? Also, more Cousin Sal please! He and my BFF Guillermo are comedy gold.

she talked to my parents (who just "happened" to be sitting outside her dressing room) for 45 minutes after the show. That is a kindness I won't forget

Recently you popularity has gone up, and "people on the internet" seem to like you more than they did 5 years ago. Do you think this change has come from you changing your style or just people warming up to you?

You'd probably know better than me. I hope you're right, I really don't know

Who's worse at paying back bets, Adam Carolla or Bill Simmons?

Carolla. No contest

If you could have a song play when you walk into a room, what would it be?

this actually does happen to me, most every night

Do you miss LOST as much as I do? :(

I miss Lost terribly

Last time you did an AMA, somebody asked you what your favorite obscure movie quote was. You responded, "Let's go to a motel. We don't have to do anything - we could just swim."

For the love of all that is holy, WHAT MOVIE IS THIS FROM????

The One and Only

Have you been face-to-face with Leno since you portrayed him during the E! Michael Jackson trial or during the parody show during Conangate? Has he responded to you personally about it?

yes - that was many years ago. We've had a number of uncomfortable moments since then

yes - that was many years ago. We've had a number of uncomfortable moments since then

no and no

What's your favorite television series at the moment?

Breaking Bad

Any chance that we'll ever see a reincarnation of The Man Show with you and/or Adam Carolla?

no

please jimmy invite will ferrel and john c. to your show

Will will be here soon.... (or) will Will be here soon?

Would you rather:

A) Be forced to do your show 24/7 for the rest of your life

or

B) Be attacked by Gary Busey once, for 15 minutes

B

Have you seen Woody Harrelson's new movie Rampage?

poor Woody....maybe next time I'll have him do this with me

If you are a hotdog, would you eat yourself?

all men would

I was a huge fan of Uncle Frank and it was very sad to see him pass. Your tribute to him was very touching. Could you tell us a story about him that has never been told before? Be it funny or sad or anything! You're awesome Jimmy!

thank you - yesterday was the six month anniversary of his death. We still miss him terribly. almost everything he did was funny.

What was your weirdest and/or most random experience with the show?

taking a picture last night with die antwoord and Huey Lewis (together) last night was right up there near the top.

Have you ever had a guest on your show that you've absolutely hated interviewing?

definitely.

Will there be a Juggy Reunion???

what would be sadder than that?

What's your favourite meme?

I'm enjoying the cinnamon challenges

Hi Jimmy. How do you get yourself to look so handsome everyday?

it's a team effort.

Name a historical figure who you would love to have a beer with

Kurt Vonnegut (does he count as historical yet?)

You host parties for Howard Stern. Does everyone that attends hope that Howard talks about them on the Stern show? Who are some people that attended that you were very surprised to see? Any other good stories about Howard in California?

Most people hope he DOESN'T

Will Mindy Kaling ever been on your show?

I hope so. Like her a lot

Will you ever bring back Celebrity Barbershop Quartet (or, at least, Celebrity in a Box)?

I forgot about that. It turns out that most celebrities object to being trapped in a box

Did you prefer The Man Show or Jimmy Kimmel Live?

Crank Yankers was the most fun of all of them

When you were younger did you ever imagine your life being how it is right now?

I often ask myself that question. Suffice it to say, I did not.

Who comes up with the tasks you ask your audience to do and film? i.e the bad christmas gifts

the writers and I - and occasionally, we get good suggestions from twitter followers

why doesnt cousin sal drink?

if you met him, you'd know

why are you always squinting? are you still close with adam?

I don't know why I squint. I can't help it. And yes, I am

What is it like meeting these super famous people. Do you ever get star struck? If you do, who was the last person you were starstruck by?

I met Oprah on Monday. She spent an hour in my bathtub.

Jimmy-Your tribute to Uncle Frank was one of the saddest yet heartwarming things ever broadcasted on television. What was your favorite moment with him?

I loved to watch him argue with my Aunt Chippy. I have hours of videotape of them fighting. Every Easter, I would instigate something

Is Dicky Barrett the coolest guy in the world?

coolest white guy

Your set at the Roast of Flavor Flav was the funniest I've seen, any chance you'll do another?

probably sometime - if the roastee is someone I know very well. The roasts have become a bit too random for me

Hi Jimmy, huge fan. Do you still hang out with Andy Milonakis? You guys going to do anything together again?

Andy lives in my attic.