Chris Kline

Reddit Grammy Meetup 2013! (it was nice to meet you Ben!)

http://www.imgur.com/XeFmAwI.jpeg

Do you feel there is any lingering risk to your life from the mafia?

Oh cool...where are you at? I'll come say hi..and maybe mumble something about narwhals.

Everything I've heard about Frank Ocean paints him as one of the nicest people on the planet. His dressing room isn't far from ours, maybe I'll try for a fiver. Last time I saw the bieb's he was flanked by 4 bodyguards who tensed up when we said hi. It's fun being an unknown backstage because the celebrities always say hi back in case you might be somebody they should know.

Randy should try being a swordfish instead of a mermaid (Did I just assume Randy's gender?)

• Yes, but I can't name names. We never do on principal. I can say at country awards shows it's usually about 2/3rds pre-tracked except for lead vocals. It's much less in the rock world. I've heard only 3 bands are using tracks tonight.
• Last time we had a show with usher he had tons of laptops running. 3 keyboard players onstage and not even one of them even bothered to mime playing that 2 note intro.
• electronic aids is pretty vague. There are plenty of drum machines playing click tracks in our ears...ear monitors could be considered electronic aid.
• there's definitely a machismo to playing live as opposed to doing the milli-vanilli. But pre-recording means you get paid twice...for the performance and the recording, so they kinda win that way.
• dave matthews came offstage at an award show and his response when we complimented him was (approximate quote) "I almost shat my pants I was so scared". We thought somebody with his experience still being that moved by it was awesome.
• miranda is definitely one who thrives on the performance. sometimes you have to reassure the producers that it will pick up for the real show. I feel that for sure. The stakes get high and I get lost in the fun of the moment. I liken it to mountain biking. It forces you to be as focused on the moment as you are capable of. Seeing Pink doing pushups and jumping around like a badass just before she hit the stage at iHeartRadio was awesome to see. However you feel about a star's music sometimes you can't deny the energy and entertainment they provide live.

A musician. A redditor. Chris Kline. You've never heard of me.

that is entirely likely.

Dat dress... i hope it's not too sexist to recount my most special 53rd grammy rehearsal experience. We sat out in the empty audience seats while the rest of the bands rehearsed. Katy Perry had a bubble machine going during the rehearsals which put out smoke filled bubbles everywhere. They looked really cool, caught the light, and made little smoke poofs when they popped. But they popped a lot and the dancers started slipping on the pools of soap. After the song she announced into the mic that it was too slippery and they couldn't dance with the floor that way. As she demonstrated to the producer how the bubbles made them slip she lost her balance for real... and to catch herself she had to double over in a full forward fold with her ass to the audience. She was wearing a very short skirt and very thin underwear. I'll be in my bunk.

We often get lectured on being careful because we represent Miranda's name...but it truly is funny how much people exaggerate when celebrities have messups. I have a little inside info on that one: The driver for one of the crew busses, probably full of technicians that never even interact with dave, decided to dump his toilet illegally...it smells awful when they get full and sometimes the drivers are too lazy to find a truck stop to empty the shitter properly. Years ago I stepped in a stream of pee from Miranda's bus when her driver dumped on the desert roadside right when I was walking up barefoot to check on another crew member...pee mud, ugh. I boiled my foot. Anyways, going over a river on a grated bridge seems like a sneaky place to dump without getting caught. But the decision had nothing to do with Dave himself...I'm sure he was asleep on another bus miles in front or on a jet. And I'm sure that driver was a good man who got fired over a careless decision. Still, it makes fun enough headline that people latch on to and don't care about details.