Iam The vending machine guy. AMA

WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE FACT ABOUT CAMELS?

A camel's hump does not store water. It stores fat, lessening heat-trapping insulation around the rest of the body.

That is a great fact about camels! Did you know the oldest known camel appeared 40-50 million years ago in North America? At that time, they were the size of a rabbit! Wow!

you sure it wasnt just a deformed rabbit?

Has anyone tried to insert the penis once they found out there's a hand at work inside there?

thats what the fake hand was for

Jerking people off?

slappin' dicks.

Have you refused to scare anyone? Be it that they are really old, or really young etc.

and what purpose does this serve? Being as you are getting paid I would be led to believe that you are, in some way, earning money.

I wouldnt scare different people for a variety of reasons, women with children, people holding hot drinks, old people etc..

It was a video that was being filmed for a Halloween youtube promotion!

Best reaction? (funniest/most scared)

worst reaction? (angriest)

and any real boring reactions? Like they didn't even realize something happened?

Best reaction was this morning, 3 girls reached in, i grabbed one of them, she jumped backwards screaming and fell on her ass laughing hysterically.

Worst was some douche kicked me in the hand!

a few boring ones, but they were a serious minority!

Which minorities do you consider the most serious?

the amish.

I just wondered about all the times in in a "zone" or have my mind wandering. Buying something from a vending machine is so mundane-- I wonder if a hand reached out at me if I would just grab the food and not even notice..

being grabbed tends to snap you out of a zone pretty quickly!

oh yea. i guess i imagined it more like you were handing them the candy without grabbing!

How did you see people coming?

Could you talk to them?

I had a walky talky, hence the headphones! A watcher would tell me how many people were coming and exactly what to do!

Did you have any conversations with people through the wall of the vending machine?

One guy, it was a beautiful bonding moment!

We need more details on this bonding moment plz.

I would, but i KrY eVerY TyME

Get a paintbrush dipped in water and "lick" their hand.

i dribbled some fake blood on some peoples hands!

What do you do when not grabbing hands?

Grab myself, and reddit.

So basically the same as when your not in the vending machine?

I dont get payed when I'm not in the machine :'(

Helloooo cute ginger. Too bad you're kind of taken

My Girlfriend is also a cute ginger, we're a powercouple.

How many souls have you stolen as a group?

69

Maybe this is a stupid question, but I'm so confused...what are you actually doing inside the vending machine?

People press a button, a snack drops down, they reach in, i grab them, everyone has a good laugh!

OK this clears things up, lol. I was under the impression that it was your regular job to be in a vending machine and you were just doing the grabbing for the Halloween season.

By regular job, I mean that you had some sort of task inside the vending machine to make it work, besides hand grabbing.

dude... that would suck!

I was really confused. I thought perhaps I'd been shaking machines full of Irishmen when my coke didn't come out.

you have been! 800 YEARS!

Next time I use a vending machine, I'm just going to stick some bubble wrap in it. Person inside can use it how they see fit.

you're doing god's work

How does one even get a job such as yours?

I'm not even sure.

How did you enter and leave the vending machine, if, say, you had to go to the bathroom or stretch?

the whole front opened!

What are the future money making opportunities in vending machines? Is it still in soda and candy or are the types of fancy machines we see in airports the way of the future? I know the Japanese use them for all sorts of products already.

You know, i think as budgets get tighter and the likes, we'll see vending machines gradually replace human shop staff.

Invest

So should I set some up? What makes a good spot to place one? Are the best spots usually the most expensive spots to rent? I'm assuming you need to rent space wherever you put it or are profits shared? Thanks for the replies, your AMA interests me which is rare.

I would say any high traffic area where people have specific needs!

IE, umbrellas at entrances/exits to public buildings.

I'm confused. :S How do you see out?

I didnt! i had a watcher who contacted me via walky talky

Fellow Irishman or one o' them English bastards? Can't imagine there's many other countries selling Rice Krispie Squares.

Serious questions though, is this for a tv ad? Do you have to do this until Hallowe'en?

For a youtube campaign, and Irish! have you not seen the shtyle of my beard???

Jaysus shure i thought twas yourself alright by the head on ya. Well fare fecks anyway, shure ya couldnt be down the bog on a day like that.

sure not with this budget! ten cents on a pint.

How do you not suffocate in there? Do you get to take bathroom breaks? Do you get to eat the candy?

I tried not to eat the candy, which was pretty tough! The floor is grated so theres a bit of airflow, and yep, I got bathroom breaks!

Does it hurt when you come out of there? Judging from the picture, it doesn't look like you have much room. You said you do this for 8 hours but how many days were you in the box?

2 days, and yeah, it hurt like hell, Leg day in the gym on monday, and then back in the box for the last two days.

not a winning combo!

It looked like fun, was it creepy for you, I take it that you were OK being in a tiny dark space for extended periods of time???

It got a bit creepy! yeah, im not too colausto.... scared of confined spaces

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image proof! http://imgur.com/0oS7dMd

Hey bud, can you edit your description at the top and put this picture up there so its easier to spot? I also want to remove the comment from Automod since its technically no longer relevant.

done!

did anybody shake the hand?

a few people! i think they just irish'd out!

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yeah! we're a nice bunch!

Uhmmmm... Hi how you doin?

im doing fiiiiiine ;)

1) What do you do for work when not scaring people from a vending machine?

2) Since you are a redditor, what is one of your favorite subreddits?

3) 100 duck size horses or 1 horse size duck?

1) I'm a chef by day and a comedian by night, heres a video of me supporting jim jeffries a while back! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CdcV7bq53Dc

2) I'm a big fan of various cycling and house music subreddits!

3) 100 duck sized horses!

Thanks for the reply. My personal favorite subreddit lately is /r/ExpectationVsReality. If I ever need a really good laugh I go there.

I will watch your video once I get off work. If you have more videos or your own youtube channel please post it. I enjoy watching standup.

that one is off my own channel! hope you like it!

im also an afficonado of /r/malefashionadvice

is this the first time you do this ?

I've done similar stuff before, but this has been the first time where i've been locked in a specifically designed vending machine and essentially attacked strangers, yeah!

What is the purpose of someone being inside a vending machine when ur not scaring people ?

torturing a person, i presume!

You're cute for a ginger.

You know how to tug my heartstrings!

Would love to know the most bags of Fritos (or other chips, which are far inferior) that have ever been stuck in one rack.

i only deal in sugary treats homie!

Did you have to go through an audition where they judged your hands?

i have majestic chef hands.

I love publicity stunts. Have you ever been part of a different one? Seems like this scary vending machine is only really good for Halloween. You should.... never mind. Can't think of any other type of vending machine prank.

Keep up the good work!

Yeah! I've done a few, last fun one was running around dublin in a spacesuit!

I won't lie. I'm jealous of your job. Sounds like it is always different and you are free entertainment for random people.

pretty much all my jobs revolve around entertainment.

i love making people happy!

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I work with a promotional company and i got roped into this!

Can I get my quarters back?

the snacks were free..

I ate your quarters, you're in the euro zone now playa!

Why no one has asked is beyond me...

What's the pay rate and hours like?

The hours sucked, early morning's with about 8 hours in the box each day.

I'd prefer not to go into specifics, but the money was worth it.

This is hilarious.

thanks Rian! hope you're keeping well! :)

How much did they pay you to sit in a vending machine?

Already said i dont wanna go into specifics on payment amounts! it was worth my while though!

How big is your dong? My mom wants to know.

vending machine sized.