dspman11

A guy opens his door and gets squirted with a dildo and you think that of me?

That man has the largest penis I've ever seen

I pocket-dialed 911 once without realizing it, and the dispatcher actually called me back to ensure I wasn't in need of help. Which was nice, but freaked me the hell out because I was alone in a park in the middle of the night and I began getting paranoid and then sprinted to the nearest area with lights and people.

I'm sure Eli's wife is pleased and grateful, then.

He's from Europe, I'm assuming the UK. He's over the legal age there.