fecalfantasy

Hi Neil. [reposted from seddit]

I am a dude who read The Game, and it opened my eyes. Just wanted to say how absolutely much reading it changed my life. Absolutely amazing book.

Now that I am older in life, and having done PUA, I realized my shortcomings were not with women - it was myself. PUA, for me, is complete and utter bullshit now. Everything in it is just breaking it down to a level that makes dudes insecure about what they are doing, and just makes their problems worse. It did for me. I have had major successes in my life just by working on myself and trying to be happy. Women included.

I am not sure how often you coach on specific titles such as PUA anymore, or if it is more a self-improvement kind of thing, but how many people have you run into that have noticed the same thing? Do you feel as if the PUA community, as it is today, has lost its touch and just plays on the insecurities of men, or do you feel that it could still do some good for the awkward 18yr old that's never gotten laid and had a horrible childhood?

Thanks again, I am absolutely excited to read all the responses to this AMA! I have been passionate about this stuff for many years.

I am absolutely THRILLED you took the time to answer my question. Thank you.

It is a very catch-22 kind of deal - I wouldn't be where I am today without it, yet despise all that is out there right now. Alot of what I learned were 'outside' factors, things that you could do on the 'outside' of yourself. PUA to me right now, is just a big blanket for REAL insecurities - they NEED the satisfaction of approval from a woman, laying down the best line to get the hottest chick and saying all the right things using all the right professional 'techniques'. The problem, I think with alot of men, is that they are never going to be OK enough with themselves, to just admit that whatever they're doing, doesn't fucking matter. It is YOU. Only YOU know YOURSELF. PUA just breaks it down to a level that I believe most dudes will just find overwhelming. There will NEVER be a perfect line for a specific girl, and I believe that PUA perpetuates that and leads men on to believe that there is, which eventually leads to self-worth issues.

IMHO, most men go into PUA because they are looking on how to get better with women - that, itself, is an 'outside' factor. I would probably venture to say that almost all men go into PUA for this, but I don't know for sure - just what I've picked up on from the years of reading forum posts after forum posts after field report after field report. There could be the exception, a dude who just wants to be genuinely better with women. But, why would a dude who already has it (a 'natural'), get into PUA? They don't need it.

Thanks again for your thoughts. I have been mulling over this stuff for a few years.