kvlt_ov_personality

http://www.reddit.com/user/kvlt_ov_personality

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kvlt_ov_personality51 karma

What are your favorite pizza toppings?

Also, sorry you got stabbed. Sounds like it was kind of a bummer.

kvlt_ov_personality4 karma

It is legal for civilians to own and wear body armor in the U.S. as long as they aren't felons.

kvlt_ov_personality3 karma

How does that make sense?

http://i.imgur.com/lLxCoWM.jpg

kvlt_ov_personality2 karma

First, if you have a car then definitely leave your luggage in the trunk until you check in. If you took an Uber or taxi, ask to leave your bags at the front desk for a few - they won't find it weird at all.

Afterward, see if they can give you directions to the nearest drugstore. You'll want to get a bottle of wine, some isopropyl alcohol (or hand sanitizer), some Dawn dish detergent and some cotton rags.

Once you get back to the room, DONT sit on the bed, go directly to the bathroom. Dump out the wine and fill the bottle up with alcohol and dish detergent. Then pour leftover alcohol on the rags and stuff one into the opening of the bottle. Usually most hotels will leave a book of matches in the bathroom, use one of them to light the rags and then go throw the bottle as hard as you can at the TV and run back to the reception counter ASAP as possible. By the time you return to your room the fire should have killed all of the bed bugs and hotel's sprinkler system should have put the fire out (hopefully).

I know what you're thinking at this point...your bed is wet, how are you going to sleep? Don't worry, as a special thank you for exterminating the room yourself the hotel will upgrade you to a complementary stay at a five star hotel with concrete or steel beds that are impervious to bedbugs. You'll also have state of the art security, three meals (instead of just the usual continental breakfast), laundry service, and best of all - communal showers.