Hey, it’s Bob Saget… Comedian, actor, director, writer and I do home improvement….Here I am talking about my new special “Zero to Sixty.” Ask Me Anything….

What is the strangest object you have inserted into your anus?

I printed out your question just now and rolled it up, so it would have to be that. This question.

Have you seen that video of that guy with Tourette’s who tics by shouting your name? If not look it up. If so, are you honored?

Of course I have, and talked about it in my last special, and honestly, I just hope his health is okay.

Considering the odds of you being accused of sexual assault are beyond 100%, have you decided to preemptively cancel this special?

This special comes from a good place and I've always put my devils out there. I haven't acted them out. I wrote a book "Dirty Daddy: The Chronicles of a Family Man Turned Filthy Comedian" and it has chapters like "Relationships I'd Rather Not Talk About" and "Things I Shouldn't Have Done." -- Drinking and driving is something no one should do and I'm lucky nothing every happened where I hurt anyone 20 years ago and was not the smartest guy all the time. But I'm very proud of the special and I get your point which is kinda silly 'cause the special not to offend but to entertain.

Rewatching your roast, Norm's anti-roast type of jokes and his comments about you seemed to get you emotional. Any memories of that event?

Many. Yes Norm had said he didn't like roasts and didn't wanna make fun of his friends. I value that. He said he was gonna read from a 40's joke book and he did. His commitment is what's so remarkable. I told him before he should curse arbitrarily if he needed to. At one point he did and as expected got a huge laugh. Norm knows what funny is.

How bad was the shit after the Hot Ones interview?

You were easily one of the best episodes!

I haven't poo'd since I filmed it weeks ago.

Since I apparently HAVE to ask a question: You are one of very few actors to be able to balance wholesome roles with gritty roles and comedy, what has the transition between the two been like over your career? Why do you think you were able to make the transition while others haven't?

P.S. I really just wanted to say: thank you for bringing so many great memories to my childhood and adulthood.

That's so nice. Thanks thelastboyscout20 - you named after the Bruce Willis movie? I love acting and I got lucky and locked into a family show and Danny Tanner which was meant for families and that's a gift to make kids laugh and plenty of single parents have thanked the whole cast for the show as there's lots of single parents who watched the show with their kids and said it helped give them things to talk about and process. I love writing and acting and directing a lot too. It's switching gears and I work hard to give 150% on everything I do, family stuff, or adult comedy, which is really just 15 year old comedy except I bring up prostate exams.

Hey Bob, big fan. Have you and John Staymos ever kissed?

John Stamos and I have kissed. But only on the cheek. He kissed my left butt cheek one night after a Beach Boys concert.

Hey Bob,

You've had an awesome career, spanning decades. Peoples faces light up when they see you. You've embraced how you entered the American Lexicon showing vids of peoples taking shots to the groin, a germophobe TV Dad, and a raunchy comedian who tells the best 'Aristocrats'... which have all created the Bob Sagat we all know.

What would we be surprised to know about you? (We know about the Herpes)

Thanks for the kind words. Herpes free thank you. Not saying I'll give them to you for free--- sayin'--- I don't got em. Kissing is fourth base to me. I guess some people would be surprised to know that when you play a character or host a show, or even do stand-up- that's just a part, a character, or possibly a different more performance version of yourself. If a person really acted like Danny Tanner they may need some therapy. I do love playin' it on Netflix cause of being with my friends, and he has changed. And people have asked why has he change-- It's 30 years later. People don't freeze and stay the 30 forever. Doesn't really make sense when I get asked that. I'm 61 now....so yeah, I'm different. I'd hope so. We all are. Just wish people were moving forward and we could feel and be more positive about life but it's so much sadness and gloom and horrific stuff out there-- We need to hit the rest button. The human race I mean.

Hi Bob. I was just wondering if you have ever seen the show Bojack Horseman. If so, how accurately do you feel this show portrays the life of someone who, back in the 90s was in a very famous tv show?

It's a funny show. I read from the producer that it's not based on me. People profile people and it's weird anyone who knows me or actually sees the amount off work I do, both literally and on myself, that I'd be a complaining horse. I mean, I do complain and I have hoofed feet, but I wake up in the morning happy (unless I see the news) and I love working-- So proud of my new special and finishing this movie I just directed and acted in with an amazing ensemble called "Benjamin," out in 2018. I don't think Bojack has any of my traits. I wonder though if he is allergic to cats like I am tho.

With all the accusations of sexual misconduct charges with comedians, I expected your name to come up, but it hasn't.

Why is that? Is it because you are as good a guy as you look, or is a shallow grave a great way to keep a secret?

Because I have legally just changed my name to Connie Silverman.

Have you ever had any Danny Tanner moments in real life, whether it be from the original Full House, or the midlife crisis type from Fuller House?

My mid-life crisis is about a 50 year one, so it's still going on. And yes I do own a dustbuster and yes I have used windex, but the character was obviously a sweet huggable dad who loved his kids on a show meant for 14 year old girls so he didn't have the dimension say of the brilliant Sheriff on "Stranger Things."

What is your advice to live a good life?

Be kind.

What is the very best cheese?

Fromunda.

Hey there, Bob! What are some of the little things in life that make you happy?

Right now, the happiest I am is that I'm engaged to a wonderful person and it's NOT John Stamos, and my three beautiful daughters are the lights of my life. That's where I get my most joy. Man I need to eat a lemon, I am turning into a Tanner.

How stressful is it to do a sequel after the success of Zero Dark Thirty?

I'm looking forward to doing new stand-up as this special was three years of rolling new stuff. I'm more concerned with how stoned you may be right now calling my special "Zero Dark Thirty" instead off the title you know it is, "Zero To Sixty," cause it's about being zero years old then becoming 60. I hope you live real long and can call your life zero to 100. But clever play on words. That kinda play on words is so quippy and catches me off guard. Wait, I'm sill laughing. Hold on, gotta get myself together.... Anyway I think I'm seeing a lot of the same questions and I've been almost on for two hours, so I've time for a few more questions if that's cool. Zero Dark Thirty....HA!!!

What is it about Norm Macdonald that makes what he says so wall-to-wall funny?

He truly is hilarious. He knows what he's going to say sometimes with premises that only he could think of, and then has this combo of a young boy (like a lot of comedians have) and other times goes off on such interesting strange rants. I can't get enough of his comedy. Very proud to have directed "Dirty Work." We actually spoke last night about doing something together again. For audiences I mean.

Hi Bob, Two questions:

Have you updated your version of The Aristocrats joke?

What fraction of your jokes work when you take them live?

That's an interesting documentary and I had only hear the joke once and told it twice. But the great George Carlin said it well- "This is not to be told to people. This is for the alley behind the bar kind of joke," and I am paraphrasing. I'm oddly not as filthy as people would like to believe, except, yes I did go for it in the telling, like jazz, in that doc and I believe in freedom of speech as long as people aren't being hurt. That's the hardest thing to tread when you do what you find funny even it's irreverent or could offend some people. I love entertaining people and I do feel my new special Zero to Sixty does it more than my past ones..

Hey Bob. My wife watches Fuller House and seems to enjoy it. Were you excited to get back together with the gang and revisit that character after all those years or whatever?

Hi, everybody I'm here! And yes, I love being on Fuller House and love everyone on it. New episodes are happening in December on Netflix-- Pt 2 of Season 3 and I'm in a couple of em. Was fun.

Hey Bob, if Youtube brings up a show called "Youtube's Funniest Home Videos", would you be on board as the host?

No thanks. I've seen enough people getting hit in the nuts to last a lifetime. And back in the day there was no YouTube so if you wanted to see a good nut hit, you had to go through me. I have of more creative stuff I'm working on and would like to do.

How did it feel to have such an important part in How I Met Your Mother as future Ted, but never being seen?

I loved the show and loved that was my role as part of it. One of the Exec Producers and one of the best directors in television is my friend Pam Fryman and she called me while I was doing a play in New York called "Privilege" by Paul Weitz and said she thought I'd be good as an older Josh Radnor. I wondered why he couldn't do it, but she and the loveliest producers in TV, Carter Bays and Craig Thomas thought it was a good idea as well. And it just organically happened. Josh and I are friends and there was a time there when I was single where we'd be in a restaurant and meet a young lady and she'd come over to say hi, and as a joke I'd say, which decade of Ted Mosby would you like to date. Josh, rightfully was the choice.

Hey Bob. Who are 3 fellow comedians who you wouldn't stop for if their car was broken down in a snow storm?

W.C. Fields, Bob Hope or Jerry Lewis.

How was it having to constantly switch between your adult comedy and family shows like AFV?

I started doing the video show in 1989 and it wasn't AFV it was AFHV and started for "America's Funniest HOME Videos" but they took out the "Home" eventually when I left. Don't know why. Feel bad for realtors. And I started doing standup at 17 so acting was what I did on Full House and the Video show was hosting a blooper show and they both ran in the top ten which was a gift. You just kind of shift your mindset with whatever you're doing and hopefully people can make the adjustment with you. I love my standup as it's what I find funny and love entertaining people. I am particularly happy with my new special, "Zero To Sixty," as it was designed to make people laugh telling some jokes, lots of stories and four new songs. Really wanna make people laugh during this time in this crazy world right now.

When did you realize you wanted to go by Bob instead of Robert?

I dunno. Robert seemed so official. Also, I like short one-syllable words.

Who's your favourite member of The Wu Tang Clan ?

Tang.

what home improvement project are you working on?

I recently fixed a couple drawers that the backs came off of. After the glue dried, I felt like I had solved all the problems of the world.

Hi Bob, thank you for the opportunity to ask.

Do YOU play video games? If you do, what game are you fond of?

What are your thoughts on Sonic and Mario?

I am currently into that tiny Zelda Nintendo Switch and I'll chill at night to stop watching news or try to stop thinking and it takes me back to playing the Nintendo 64 with my youngest daughter when she was young. A bit nerdy of an admission.

Love your work! If you had to go back in time and choose a different career path what would you choose?

I would go back in time two hours and do this Reddit again cause I really enjoyed the connection with those of you had time to reach out to. Sorry I couldn't;t type faster and I appreciate all your questions even the ones I ignore --but you woulda too-- Can only do positiveness these days.... Hope you can catch my special "Zero To Sixty" now on iTunes, Amazon and literally most digital platforms including so many cable services. Really appreciate all the complements and trust I didn't offend anyone. Have a good night everybody....Peace out.

What makes someone a "comic's comic"? Who is the ultimate one currently?

I dunno. I love most comedians. I love people who have something to say, know themselves, have that relationship with audiences and are funny. Gotta be funny. I grew up as a young comic with the genius of Richard Pryor, being friends with Rodney Dangerfield. I love a lot of comedians, many that are friends. I love Dave Chapelle, Chris Rock, Bill Burr, Jerry Seinfeld, Sarah Silverman, John Oliver, Norm MacDonald, and so many others. People with a heart who get out their thoughts and everyone is so different. I miss Don Rickles who was like a dad to me.

Can you separate the art from the artist? When you find out that you can't respect the person, can you still respect the art the same way?

That all seems to be changing now doesn't it? Once I got kind of known and was meeting people well known, relatives and friends may ask, "Is he or she nice?" And I'd be like, "What's the difference, if they have talent and you like their work you don't have to have them as a friend." Right now, it'd be nice to see some general empathy and responsibility, and I think even on Twitter we are seeing it more by well known people who want to see human beings treated properly everywhere. Worried for all our kids the world hurting and de-evolving like this, but maybe it'll cause us all to take more responsibility and have more civlity.

What up Saggy Bob Sack!?

Can you see yourself adopting this nickname I just bestowed upon you?

Thanks for the pitch but my name was hard to grow up with, so I don't any other nick names. And I stay away from Sack.

Hey my dude, I️ just need a bit of advice. My roommate sleeps upside down like a vampire at night and freaks me the fuck out what should I️ do?

Get a good pull up bar, put it in a doorway next to where your roommate sleeps, wear gravity boots and be head to head and you'll sleep much better.

Hey Bob,

My wife refuses to watch your standup because she doesn't believe you are anything but Tanner-esque. Is there anything you'd like to say to her?

Whatever she wants is her choice. Danny Tanner wasn't a real person. It's like saying Anthony Hopkins played Hannibal Lector so he was cannibal in real life. And I don't know what Danny Tanner would do as a standup-- clean your glasses on stage. Anyway, she doesn't have to watch anything she doesn't want to and I wish her well.

I guess the hot topic question to ask a famous and beloved actor and comedian is whether we will hear a sex scandal break about you in the future?

Only if the person won't get off of me after I tap out.

Of all the comics you have known who died too young, who left the most on the table?

Maybe Bill Hicks. Knew him. Such a sweet guy. Andy Kaufman. A genius.

You just got a call. They want you to be the next big superhero! Who are you playing?

I used to have a stupid joke when I was 18 that answers your question, "I wish I was the Incredible Hulk, because when I see a pretty girl I burst out of my pants." Now given the events of this month, that creates a need for more thoughtfulness and carefulness on even a dumb adolescent joke like that-- But man, it's a harmless thing I shouldn't;t have hit 'send' on.

Did you and John make a pact to propose to your girlfriends around the same time?

No, we just fell in love around the same time. John with himself and me with promoting my new special, "Zero To Sixty" which is unusual as no comedy special has ever been released with this model-- It's out now on iTunes and Amazon, both the movie and the Audio Album but it's also on a crazy number of digital platforms-- AT&T, Google-Play, Direct TV, Spectrum, Comcast-- literally like 100 of em all over the world so people can see it on demand pretty much anywhere. Exciting for me as I loved filming it at the Williamsburg Music Hall in Brooklyn.

Do you know why the 30-year "Dad-iversary" episode of Fuller House wasn't part of the first half of S3, to coincide with the actual 30th anniversary of Full House?

Well, maybe it's cause the shows coming up in December were more suitable for then so it was well planned I'd think by Netflix and Warner Brothers and our producers. Such a boring answer. Sorry.

Any possibility we will ever see the original version of Dirty Work? Does the original R Rated script exist anywhere accessible?

There is an R-rated cut. I wanted it to be R-rated but was talked down by the producer and the studio and it was their film so you do what the man says to do. A really funny 7 minutes are missing and we had to do some looping/dubbing. I think it woulda done better than it did cause it wasn't promoted to well. The poster said "Coming Soon." And the movie was made for 15 year old boys and it was Michael Jordan's final games in Chicago with the Bulls so we didn't have great timing for the release. Thanks for asking.

When did you first work the Comedy Store? Did you get in there near the tail end of the early days?

I started there in 1978. I worked there trying to get jobs and touring in-between and taking acting and improv classes for like 8 years. When I got there I was introduced by David Letterman one night, hung out with the deeply missed Robin Williams, and was treated so kindly by Billy Crystal, Michael Keaton, Jay Leno, lots of people that shaped who I was and became through my 20's.

Hey Bob, big fan.

You've done a lot of work that I've enjoyed but I think I was at that peak point of adolescence when "Rollin' With Saget" came out that it is just ingrained in my childhood memories.

My question is, do you plan on releasing any music in the future? Your sense of humor is terrific and I would definitely love more songs featuring you.

Thanks a lot. I didn't write "Rollin." With Saget," that was by my friends Jamie Kennedy and Stu Stone for an MTV show they did. I've been writing music though since I'm like 15 and All my specials and standup has several songs in it. In my new special -- Don't know if I've mentioned it-- "Zero to Sixty," I sing four new comedy songs and the last one is "We've Got to Be Kind To Each other," and my soft -R-ish version of "Give Peace A Chance," and that's the mantra for the special. Just trying to put some positiveness out there, even if it's also veiled with some blueish stories or material at times. If something's funny, it's funny. And everyone has very strong opinions on that. It's like music. Some people worship and artist and their friend may not the like the exact same artist. I'm too serious on here. I'm gonna lighten up now.

Hi Mr. Saget! As an actor, whats the best thing a director can do for you on set? Thanks! :~)

I've had the good fortune working on some good things. Couple years ago got to be in a wonderful play on Broadway replacing the original actor, Marc Kudisch in "Hand To God" for a few months with the best cast imaginable in the best play imaginable. The director was Moritz Von Stuelpnagel and he helped me become a Lutheran Paster and play it real, even though the play had so many dark comedy levels to it. Robert Asking wrote it and it's a work of art. Moritz did what great directors do, they kindly and graciously help you find the character by playing it. By finding your version of it. That makes me want to be a better director. On my movie, "Benjamin," I wish I had a little more time to work with the wonderful actors to help them find their stuff-- and they all brought it big time. My next film I'd like to just direct and give fine actors the time to prepare and rehearse which is the dilemma with indie film. I've been fortunate to work with some wonderful directors and looking forward to working with more, if they'll have me.

Why did Rodney like to flash his junk to anyone that he came across? Was it just a coincidence or carelessness? Since 90% of comics seem to share that experience, it sounds almost pathological.

I think he liked to keep it loose. We all have bag-gage. He was a good guy to me. And he never showed me his stuff, we just hung out and talked about comedy. He also helped my career putting me on his first young comedians HBO special with Sam Kinison, Louie Anderson, Rita Rudner, Bob Nelson, lotsa people.

we always here stories about how difficult it is to work with children and animals on set. having to work with young children and a super adorable doggo regularly on full house, which did you find more difficult and why?

You kinda just take the job if you want it and the opportunity presents itself and roll with the dynamics. I guess Mickey Rooney was the hardest to work with cause to make us laugh, especially, John, Mickey lifted his shirt over his head and flashed his man-boobs at us. Still can't shake that image today.

Mr. Saget ... huge fan here ... actually named one of the tables at my wedding after you (favorite Jewish comedians).

I'm curious which behind the scenes activity you enjoy more ... writing, directing or producing?

Thanks a lot. Appreciate that. I just completed directing a movie I'm very proud of that was very hard to get made. A low-budget indie dark comedy that really struck my heart. Took us 5-7 years to get it shot these past few months. I'd been asked to direct "Benjamin," by my producer Nicholas Tabarrok and the writer, Joshua Turek. I loved the script so much, about a dysfunctional family where it was believed 15 year old Benjamin was doing crystal meth. I ended up play his father, and my girlfriend in the the film, played Mary Lynn Rajskub posts on Facebook to have an intervention for him. Not the place you announce an intervention, hence the dark comedy. The incredible ensemble dealt with very rough shooting circumstances and just came together making a film I can't wait to share with people next year. Rob Corddry plays the family's gynecologist who leads the intervention as he's the only doctor there, and Parenthood alum Max Burkholder plays my son Benjamin. The rest of the cast I was blessed with is Kevin Pollak, Cheri Oteri, Dave Foley, Peri Gilpin, Clara Mamet, Jonny Weston, David Hull, and James Preston Rogers. We are in final post now, doing all that color correction and sound mix and festival submitting like ya do. I'll be promoting it like a hoe then too when it's time as I love the film and hope people do as well. My character is like a multi dimensional Danny Tanner who majorly goes off the rails. No spoiler alerts here, but addiction is a serious issue and the movie tries to make a real point. It was very well written.

Did winning the student academy award mess with you? Did success feel inevitable and screw with your drive or anything?

I I thought I'd go out to LA and actually went to USC Grad Film School for three days but I had been doing standup in Philly before moving there and when Mitzi Shore at the Comedy Store said come work out here, I jumped at the chance because I wanted to do that too and the place was off the charts then. Still is, because people need comedy bad now.

What do you miss most about the time full house was set in?

I live in the present, so I don't get sentimental about the 80's but I have memories I loved about the time, mostly with people I cared and care about. I also had gigantic hair, so who really wants to blow dry and brush it under like a bouffant?

Do you regret making Farce of the Penguins as much as I regret watching it?

No, I loved it. Sorry you didn't.