wbwtim

I reread that article recently and think it holds up surprisingly well, given that I somehow had the gall to write it when I was years away from being married. If I had to do it over, I might soften the "these marriages are bad and these are bad reasons to get into a marriage" language a bit. It's just so not a black and white situation. It's two complicated people forming a complicated, evolving partnership together, and a lot of different types of marriages—even those that seem not so great from the outside—can work well for the people in them.

I think the Forgettable Wednesday and Traffic Test points from Part 2 are really correct and really important. Most of marriage is hanging out chatting unremarkably on a random day. That certainly doesn't need to be exhilarating at all times, but if it's generally pretty fun to be together, it makes your life generally pretty fun.

Currently having a random tiny baby living in my apartment emphasizes another point: It's a really good idea to date for long enough to really work out your major issues with each other before having a kid. You want to be on the same page about most big things, and when conflict or disagreement inevitably comes up, you want to be old pros at working through it and coming to compromise. I said the other day that I was thankful our dogs were not puppies right now, because having a baby and training a puppy at the same time would be a nightmare, and it's the same deal with relationships. Need the relationship fully out of the puppy phase before the baby comes!

I agree with it! I'm still working out where I stand on the excited <> worried <> terrified spectrum, but either way, caution is the obvious move.

I'm currently doing a lot of intake on this topic—reading, discussing, thinking—and will write something about it once I get more clarity on what I think.

I heard someone say the other day that extraverts think the internet makes people lonelier and introverts think the internet makes people less lonely.

I think it'll be like that. Some people are great at making friends. Others are not. But social connection is something almost all of us need, and loneliness is excruciating.

I do think AI friends will be a thing, and I think it'll be a great thing for people who normally have a hard time making friends. And maybe a depressing turn of events for people who already have a lot of friends. But those people have a lot of friends, so they're fine. So I think it'll be a net positive.

I like trains. I am always blown away that the first trains happened in like 1804. That is a really old time to have something as modern as trains. John Adams could have gone on a train. Napoleon could have gone on a train. It doesn't make sense. I also don't know if I'm correct about the 1804 time but I think I am. What I know for sure is that Abe Lincoln rode on trains, which again just doesn't compute. He's from like the 1400s.

The other thing I like about trains is their insane potential. I don't know if Hyperloop-like technologies are still called "trains" but I want there to be a 1,000 mph train! Imagine going from LA to SF in 30 min like taking a subway from Brooklyn to Uptown Manhattan.

It's not easy! Which is part of why I wrote a book. In frustrating conversations I'd feel like I needed to do an 8 hour presentation to the person to fully explain my position. My advice for tough political conversations is to speak with your Higher Mind at their Higher Mind. You have to make both of your Primitive Minds leave the room before any productive or interesting discussion can happen, and once they do, it's amazing how much can come out of the convo. So don't attack, don't roll your eyes, don't interrupt them when they're trying to get their point out. Hear them out. Ask questions. Point out areas where you agree with them. Then explain your own position in a calm, humble tone.

If you're talking about What's Our Problem? start with the basics: explain the Ladder and maybe the concept of Echo Chambers and Idea Labs and see where it takes you.