IAMA person who gave a complete stranger CPR. This is what happened after . . .

Wow, i expected some usual American story about how you were sued and lost everything for helping another human being.

Everything went better than expected. erm.. cept for the dying.. but you tried your best and that's just the way life works! nothing to regret, be proud.

I apologize for hijacking the top thread, but as an EMT, I think it's important that at least a few people see this. I don't want to disrespect this person's ability to react to a bad situation; many people would have frozen at a time like this, or had no idea what needed to be done. Unfortunately, there are a few things that I feel like I need to say.

First, if you see a person drop in front of you, take 5 seconds to assess their breathing. If they aren't breathing, or they are "gasping" very occasionally, there's a very good chance that they are in cardiac arrest, and you should immediately begin chest compressions as fast and as hard as you can. (They have taken the "pulmonary" out of CPR for bystanders recently.)

Second, if you are a medical provider administering CPR before EMS arrives, you do not need to give breaths if it appears to be dangerous for you to do so (like if their face is covered in blood). Please don't harm yourself unnecessarily. If you do have a pocket mask, remember that you shouldn't be "blowing as hard as you can." Hard breaths will close the epiglottis, and your air will go into their stomach.

I took the time to write this because bystander CPR does save lives. Early CPR can give enough oxygen to someone's brain to give them full function back if we manage to restore spontaneous circulation. When I arrive on the ambulance, I always hope that someone on scene has been doing CPR.

I hope that those who read this will be better educated, but will never have to use this information. If you haven't taken a CPR class, consider doing it. You could save someone's life. For more information about compression only CPR, go here.

Oh, and don't forget to call me. My number is still 911 (in the US).

I just called your number and asked for thesavagemonk. The lady yelled at me and said I'd be arrested. Fuck you.

lol . . . Reddit humor still catches me by surprise regularly. :)

I laughed at this.

Yeah. I tried to remind myself of that when I found out she passed and I wouldn't be able to talk to her. "That's how life is." kind of thing. I still have to sigh over it a bit sometimes though.

You did a Very Good Thing. Thanks for sharing your story. If only a story like yours could go on the front page news every time a horror story ran.

I do feel you have a very good point. So much of the news seems wasted upon the dissemination of, not news, but violence, negativity, and aggressive sensationalism. It makes us really think that we humans are nothing more than savages killing savages. But we're NOT. Unfortunately, all the negative media bombardment often creates a negative self fulfilling prophecy and many of us actually end up BEING as bad as the news describes NOT because we just "are", but because the bombardment created a very negative environment that left many of us little choice BUT to react in a negative manner.

Citing the crime and the negativity in society IS indeed responsible journalism, but ALSO giving a LOT more time to what is GOOD and helpful and constructive in this society would help A LOT. It would, very likely, create POSITIVE self fulfilling prophecies.

In some states there are "Good Samaritan" laws - where people providing help cannot be sued. It also applies to off duty paramedics/emt or other types of public servants and first responders. If you're genuinely trying to help, the family of someone cannot implicate that you did something wrong.

Not sure about OP's states policies on Good Samaritan laws though - In general, as an EMT, I was scared about this before I was taught that we're protected if off duty (as long as you provide treatment in your scope of duty)

I'm not actually aware of what the law is like here (California) with regard to a "good samaritan" scenario, but I honestly can't imagine ever placing any law or statute of limitations above what seems an obvious "moment of need" on the part of one person or the other. I would generally act to try to help someone regardless of what the law says.

While I do not have a martyr complex, I am vehemently DEFIANT of, for example, the possibility that I might actually be punished or go to jail for literally trying to do the right thing. If I know in my heart of hearts that I had intentions to help someone, and my actions were based on decent, common sense, then - even if something unfortunate occurred to me or whoever I tried to help - I would be bouied by the fact that my intentions were benevolent.

Wow, i expected some usual American story about how you were sued and lost everything for helping another human being.

I think the reversal of expectations is what the OP deliberately played off of with the title.

Props to him, though, for just spitting out that blood and continuing like a boss!

Thank you, sir.

You know what though? I actually wasn't necessarily expecting or trying to steer people into thinking "and then I got sued" so that I could turn the expectation of it upside down on them. My actual intention by continuing with the "This is what happened after . . ." sentence was trying to let people that just came across the link know that there actually WAS more to the story and it actually wasn't a post recounting a CPR experience only. As important as the lesson behind the CPR moment was/is, I think it's also important for one to understand and appreciate what happened after at the memorial service and how it provided an opportunity for very different people from different walks of life that didn't at all previously know me to still reach out and embrace a complete stranger that tried to help another human being.

THAT to me is just as important as the admittedly valuable lesson of doing your best to help people around you in need of help.

That happened to some one Reddit several months back. He saved a woman from drowning and she decided to sue him. Eventually, he counter-sued and went on Judge Judy with the case. Never did hear a follow-up, though I'd like to see that episode.

Yeah. I read that link. That was actually the link that kind've prompted me to post this link as well. As I said elsewhere on here, I wanted to post another link that was similar-ish to the one you just referenced in order to reinforce the idea that we should help one another REGARDLESS of whether we think things will turn out okay or not.

They looked at her bleeding on the ground, motionless, and said they weren't allowed to help her for "liability reasons".

In Germany, that's "unterlassene Hilfeleistung", "failure to help in an emergency", and can put you into prison for up to one year, especially if this failure to help results in someone elses death.

That's a good idea and a law that should implemented everywhere. What if it is a crowd who does nothing in an emergency? I.e. Kitty Genovese story and 'diffusion of responsibility?'

Everyone is responsible. The simple fact that "nobody else did anything" is not an excuse.

The one thing is that you don't have to help if you would endanger your life, but that would likely not be the case in a Kitty Genovese situation where you have more than one bystander.

Yeah . . . but that's the thing. And I'm actually glad you brought up this point because it illustrates very well what actually happens to all of us citizens on a global scale.

It's a kind of paradox. Although it IS in fact the case that if everyone moved forward, there is no way the assailant would be able to withstand the force, often no ONE person is individually willing to move forward and risk their lives specifically . . . so everyone stands back, doesn't move, doesn't act, and nothing gets accomplished.

While I don't necessarily want to get off the subject here, this is actually EXACTLY how governments are able to take complete and unadulterated control and advantage of entire populations. We have been brought up and bred and fed such a caustic diet of selfish "me, me, me" perspectives that we have COMPLETELY forgotten what kind of strength and beauty we all have COLLECTIVELY against ANY tyranny, against ANY malicious government.

While the individual human being is often very vulnerable indeed, the COLLECTIVE Individual is stronger than ANY malicious force that has ever walked the Earth.

However, because we've forgotten and have allowed ourselves to be fooled into believing that we are all separate and should "watch out for ourselves", we allow ourselves to be completely taken advantage of and picked apart individually.

Divide and conquer, eh? Divide and conquer.

It's difficult to be sure, but we must break out of this illusion called separation - politically, monetarily, psychologically, spiritually, etc - and realize that we would have a LOT more power and freedom and ability if we were as together as we could possibly be.

Onetime lifeguard, firefighter, and current EMT here- just FYI, the chances someone over the age of 50-60 that has a "medical" heart attack (versus something like electrocution, drowning, asphyxiation) is ever going to walk out of the hospital is under 1%. I think the overall rate is something like 9-10%, depending upon the study. But- clot to the cardiac arteries, and there's not much that can be done.

So, FWIW, good on you for taking the initiative, and hope you didn't kick yourself too hard if you were down about the outcome.

Thank you very much for that information, sir. Very much appreciated.

Best,

Good job.

Thank you.

Thank . . . you . . . for . . . this. . . Great. . . post . . . Thanks a . . . g . . . a . . . i . . . n. It was . . . a nice . . . read . . .

Thank you very much for your statement and sentiment. I feel your intentions through your text, and bow down before you in respect. :)

this is crazy, and i'm very sorry that the woman did not make it.

so i can get a better understanding:

are you male or female? how old are you? did the doctors or family members ever inform you of a cause of death? was it a heart attack or stroke or something? did any of her immediate family members indiviually speak to you at the memorial? what did they say to you?

thank you for doing this AMA.

edit: when did this happen?

I am a male.

At the time that this happened (few years ago), I was in my late 20s/early 30s.

I believe I might have a vague recollection of having heard mention of . . . a heart attack or heart failure of some sort.

I spoke to various family members not only during the wake, but actually before the wake took place. Her sister called me and I spoke at length about what happened.

There was not a LOT of words spoken, but there was a LOT of unspoken, emotional appreciation expressed by everyone that was there. There was a great outpouring of appreciation that someone at least cared enough to at least ATTEMPT to help.

They didn't say much. They just looked at me, held my hand fondly, hugged me, and kept looking at me - simply saying "Thank you." with their eyes.

This is quite an amazing story, I wish I could upvote it more. Have you remained in touch with the family over the years? Also, are you aware that the new method of CPR does not require mouth to mouth?

I feel very pleased to say that I have indeed remained in touch with her sister and her family over the years. Her sister and her family and I have sent one another Christmas cards, etc over the time. It is all the more appreciated because we are (at least in appearances) such different looking people. They are white, simple but good-hearted, midwestern farmer type people. I am Spanish - Puerto Rican - but have a lot of African blood mixed in, so I look more African American "mixed" type to most people than anything else.

But yes. We are still in at least seasonal contact - which I appreciate.

are you aware that the new method of CPR does not require mouth to mouth?

Are you referring to the device that EMTs use to squeeze air into people requiring CPR? If so . . . it was just me by my self giving her CPR for a while before any EMTs arrived. Is there some "non mouth to mouth" method of emergency CPR that can be given?

www.msnbc.msn.com/id/23884566/ns/health-heart_health/ This article explains it pretty well. I should put this in TIL.

Ahh . . . so chest compressions are all that's needed. Okay . . . Thanks for that info. :)

Oh man, I so thought you were going to get sued.

Do you know the cause of death?

You know what? I just read the IAMA where the guy saved the woman from drowning and she sued him. It infuriated me, but I wanted to also do an IAMA that, even though it may not have had a happy ending, it served as yet another example of how we could (and should) help one another regardless of the possible risks involved.

I believe what happened to her was that she had some sort of heart failure.

Respect buddy. I am not sure how I would perform in that situation, but it sounds like you responded like a champ. I hope if I ever have a similar problem there is somebody like you nearby.

Thank you, sir.

You made me cry...

I wish there were more people like you.

There are.

Look in the mirror. :)

That was unexpected!

I don't know if you have a special power or something but your reply made me drop a few tears again.

Thank you!

Edit: If you ever go near Montreal, pm and I'll buy you a beer. You seem like a person I would be honored to meet and learn from.

I genuflect before your gesture of honor and good will.

Thank you much,

correct me if i'm wrong, but isn't the first step of CPR to confirm if the person has in fact stopped breathing?

yes it is. and then to blow in the airway to see if there is something blocking air from entering.

Yep. That's correct also. Heck, now as you're mentioning this, I must admit that that's one thing I did not check - i.e. if there was something obstructing the air passage.

I will say this: I was aware - on at least a "split-second" subconscious level, that a situation where there is a blockage of the air passage would tend to also coincide with at least some sort of (often involuntary) gag and choking reflex. There was NONE of that in this situation. That is why no one but me notice what had happened. She did not react violently like she was choking on something she was eating that got stuck in her windpipe or anything. Like I said, she just took a few barely noticeable stutter steps . . . and then just fell forward.

I already knew that it was likely not a choking scenario or that her air passage was blocked. Also, prior to the first breaths I gave her, I lifted the back of her neck up and pulled her head back a bit in order to straighten her windpipe/air passage. I don't recall necessarily doing this to "consciously" check for any food or gum or anything stuck in her windpipe - and perhaps I should have - but no . . . I just did it to stabilize her head and neck so I could give her breaths.

Yeah. I think one of the catch phrases when I was taught was something like "Stop, look, and listen." or something like that.

I was multitasking majorly when I got to her.

She was face forward - down on the concrete motionless as a pool of blood started collecting at her face. I was very, very close to her when I decided to help. I grabbed her and turned her over and took a good look at her in the process. She had bit her tongue very hard in the fall, her eyes were half open, and there was no heaving of her chest. I was able to assess confidently that she was in fact not breathing pretty quickly upon taking a look at her state and listening to her for a brief moment.

Edit: Also, and again, I will not pretend that I was in a state of mind to have followed perfect CPR protocol. I will admit that I felt I had to act very quickly, so I don't want to give the impression that my wits were "cool, calm, and collected". I was not at all out of control per se, but I was definitely nervous and the adrenaline was going.

Wow, props to you dude. Mouth to mouth on a blood/mucous covered stranger. I would never do that shit.

Well, I think it's all relative. I mean I would imagine you would do some pretty amazing things under the right circumstances that I probably simply wouldn't be able to fathom. I'm sure there's stuff about you that would make me go "Damn. I would never be able to do that shit." :)

Thanks very much for the props though.

I rarely read stories like this on reddit. Though it wasn't really a happy ending for the family of that lady, I thank you for being one in a million Americans not frightened of being liable to any responsibility and was more human than anybody else in the world.

I thank you very, very much for the sentiment, but you CANNOT be right in saying the "more human than anybody else in the world" part. I know you weren't being literal . . . but it CAN'T be the case that we do not ALL have this beauty and this love for one another inside of us. It is a very difficult world we live in, but it also HAS to be the case that we humans have great abilities to love one another.

This world we live in certainly does a lot to diminish that reality, but always know that it IS indeed inside of all of us.

Thank you for your comments.

Peace,

this is one of those IAmAs that really stands out to me. I don't really know what to say other than.. I truly respect you. I can only wish that more members of society were like you, and that we all truly had each others back like that. Thank you for this. Gives some faith in humanity :)

When I hear that we humans are "just" blood thirsty barbarians and - if not for all the rules and laws and government, etc, etc - we'd kill each other and tear each other limb from limb . . . I simply think that's just wrong . . . Because I know I'm not a saint by any stretch of the imagination . . . but I also know I have love for my fellow human beings (and all life really) . . . and I don't think I'm all THAT different from everyone else.

So I look at the rest of the world like I look at myself: Full of anger and vices at some times . . . but full of hope and love and togetherness at others.

So I can't see how we as a species WOULDN'T learn how to get along much better if we didn't have all the government and religious insanity that we do.

Anyway though . . . I digress. That's another subject altogether.

Thank you for the thoughts. :)

You seem like a hell of a person. You did something remarkable, and I think everyone here is impressed beyond measure.

Thanks for being caring, helpful and motivated.

I think a very, very important thing here with regard to me is that I'm definitely a VERY normal person. I'm just like you, just like everybody else. We are all wonderful and beautiful. We are all jerks and selfish. We all have all these things inside of us. I fight with these demons just as much as the next person - just as much as we all do. I have many faults, and I personally think it wouldn't be a horrible thing if you and everybody else on here actually SEE just how flawed and "like everybody else" I absolutely am . . .

. . . because that way, everyone on here will see that I'm NOT a hell of a person. I'm NOT a remarkable person.

Or at least there's nothing about me that's any more remarkable than YOU or than whoever else. I think we ALL have it in us to do things like this. Absolutely. And we WILL. We'll all get called upon to do things and "rise up to the challenge" at some point or the other in our lives.

And with all our flaws, all our idiosyncrasies, all our jealousies and all our hates each and every one of us STILL has enough love and good will within us to STILL be good people, help one another, and do the right thing.

You know how I absolutely know this beyond a shadow of a doubt? You know how I absolutely know that regardless of how much of a jerk anyone is, they STILL have genius and beauty and love within them?

I know this because I look at myself . . . I look in the mirror, and know that as much of a flawed jerk as I can sometimes be, I can ALSO be the person that ANY random stranger can also depend upon for help if they need it; for love if they need it.

So if I can do that and I'm as flawed as I am . . . heck, I know ANYBODY can do it. I know EVERYONE'S a hell of a person - a remarkable person. We just have to STRIVE for it.

Okay . . . enough talking. :)

Thanks, Peace

i dread the moment that i have to use what i've been trained to do

Yeah. Let's hope you don't ever have to. :)

Edit: However, don't be afraid to put your skills to use in order TO help another person if they need it.

Whoa. That's crazy.

• Have you had any other opportunities to save someone since this incident?

• Did you confront the security guards afterwards?

Have you had any other opportunities to save someone since this incident?

Well . . . I used to be a bouncer and ended up getting shot at from point blank range by a bullet that was initially intended for a coworker. The patron came there to shoot the coworker, but I knocked the assailant momentarily unconscious. When the assailant came to (in a few seconds) he decided to shoot at me instead, since I had just punched him. The coworker hugged me profusely afterward when he realized that had I not temporarily knocked out the assailant, he would have been fully alert, would have had much better aim and likely would have shot my coworker.

Did you confront the security guards afterwards?

Na. I was upset for a second, but then realized I had to stop thinking about how stupid their response was and just help the lady. After it was over, I actually had to continue on to the appointment that I had in the studio, believe it or not. I just figured they were "doing their job". I thought it was stupid, but also tried to give them the benefit of the doubt.

Wait...so how did that go? Showing up for your audition all covered in blood.

Well, it was mostly just my face that was covered in blood - kind've from my nose down, as that's the part that was making the most contact. After the EMTs arrived and took her away, the staff at the studio gave me some cups of water that I washed my face with.

And I actually ended up getting the part I went in for. It wasn't anything huge or anything. It was a "co-star" on a television show called "Nip Tuck". Not sure if it's on any more or not. Don't know.

Hold on a minute. You were shot?! Where? How did the situation arise where you "knocked the assailant momentarily unconscious"?

As I mentioned, I used to be a bouncer. Toward the end of the night, a fight took place inside, and there were a group of patrons that were forcibly escorted out of the establishment. They ran away in a hurry, looking back as they did so. The bouncers then went back inside. A few moments later, we were informed that two or three guys that started it all had come back.

At that point, I knew that the situation was much more serious. It had escalated from the problems inside to things getting even worse outside. The general rule was "don't punch patrons" (of course), but I knew at this point that the guys didn't come back to just "talk things through".

The main patron (big black dude) made a bee-line toward a coworker of mine - the bouncer who actually tied him up and threw him out. Before he got to him, however, I threw what I must admit was a beautiful right hook that landed square on his chin. He took a Nestea plunge toward the concrete, at which point I immediately turned around toward my coworker to make sure he was alright. When I looked at him, I saw him look down and over my shoulder, and he froze and his eyes just got REAL big. It didn't register what he was reacting to . . .

. . . and then I just heard the biggest, loudest "BOOM" right behind me. There were about 200 patrons outside at the time, and the place spread like wildfire and people just started running and stampeding everywhere.

I found all the sudden that literally everyone had ran as fast as they could AWAY from me.

At that moment I turned around, looked at the ground, and found that the "BOOM" was coming from a big shiny glock that the now semi-conscious patron had come back with and had intended to use on my coworker bouncer that had kicked him out. It was just him and me at this point (since everyone else had wisely run away in panic) and he was laying in the position he had fallen in just after I hit him. In other words, he was about five or six feet away from me with his back on the ground, pointing his gun up at me...and shooting, hoping to now hit me with bullets that were originally intended to kill my coworker.

It took me a moment to register all this as I looked at him firing off a second round right at me.

I turned around and dove into the club's side door.

I later found out that he hit two patrons with his gunfire.

They both survived fortunately . . . but, well . . . it was just simply an unfortunate thing that this happened period.

TIL no1113 is Batman.

lol. No. I was just doing what was my job at the time. lol.

It's ok Batman, we're all friends here.

Friends?

Dude, first of all, he's the Dark Knight. We're supposed to hunt him just because he can take it so none of that "friends" bullshit.. Second of all, he's Batman. Of course he's not gonna admit to anything. Especially whether or not he's the Batman. In public in an IAMA on some measly dark corner of the interwebz

lol

Very surprised to find the personalities on Reddit so endearing. :)

So, just to be clear, none of the bullets hit you, right? You went out unscathed?

Correct. Unfortunately, the bulltes hit two other bystanders, sending both of them to the emergency room and into intensive care. I heard they both made it through, however, so I am indeed grateful for that.

Makes me wonder if no1113 has ever survived a train accident, and whether he is okay in water.

Well, I am very okay in water, as I am from an island and used to be a lifeguard. I've been on a train, but, fortunately, have never been in a train accident. :)

College Freshman here. I earned my Lifeguarding certificate about 6 months ago, and your story inspired me to review my CPR technique. I hope to have the strength you had when I'm faced with such a situation. Thanks for your story

Yes. Review it. Don't make the same mistake I did! :) Isolate the air passage!

And yes, I am sure you will have the strength to use your training in the best way possible if and when it's needed.

Best to you. :)

What actually caused her death?

I believe it was heart failure. I am not 100% certain, but I believe that's what I recall hearing or being told.

Thank you for sharing - that would have been a total mind fuck to have to speak about her to the group.

Just a side note - it's been pointed out that the chances of CPR working on an adult with no heart rate are very minimal, however this is not the case for infants and children!

that would have been a total mind fuck to have to speak about her to the group.

And it was. It was even more so because I had NNNOOOO idea that I was going to have the type of reaction that I did . . . that I would be effected the way I was. When I started feeling it happening, I thought to myself "Oh my God. What's happening?? No no no no! Don't do this! In front of all these people!!?? Oh my God stop!" and next thing I know, I'm feeling overwhelmed with emotion - it almost felt like I was super sensitive to or channeling everybody's emotions there . . . and it just completely overwhelmed me and I started crying.

How did it feel later finding out she didn't make it? Did it make the news at all?

I don't know if it made the news since I don't have nor do I watch tv (haven't owned one in over 12 years if you can believe that. Perhaps that's worthy of another IAMA in its own right.)

How did I feel? Part of me felt like I could have REALLY let it effect me and cause me to be/get down. The other part of me, however, caused me to acknowledge the sadness of it, feel it for a while, sigh over the cycle of life as it occurs on this planet, and simply wish her the best as she continued along in her journey.

So, forgive me, but did you ever wind up getting a STD?

No worries. No. I did not get an std. I've thought about that every now and then, and kind've felt that even if I would have, it would not have caused me to regret trying to help her.

Thanks for this.

Thank you.